11/14/2022
Every morning I pray and often through out the day; before I eat or drive the car. At times it feels compulsive, I feel anxiety welling up within my body as I rush to state the words, trying to remember all of what I have time to be grateful for. It feels as if my list of gratitude is never ending nor satisfied and I can’t truly cover everything while honestly feeling grateful. I become fearful that if I miss the wrongthing God will think I am taking it for granted and I will be punished.
Here is the thing; God does not THINK. We also don’t get punished by God. These are all thought forms conditioned through a religious upbringing.
Whenever I feel anxious, fearful, wrong, or rushed. I AM not really talking to God. In these moments, my well intended prayer, has morphed into a stream of thinking (a thought form) because the prayer is being treated as a means to an end. I am not truly being present when I feel this way. In this sense these “prayers”, while well intended, are more harmful than good when done in this way (without presence); when rushed through or done out of fear or habit.
There are other times when I truly feel in my heart that I AM speaking to God. The grand source from within is connecting to itself, I AM simply witnessing and observing. Any participation or words flow naturally. These prayers feel more like an integration of BEING rather than DOING . In these prayers I feel the gratitude . The prayers are much simpler, the list of “things” is much shorter because I trustand know that what I feel is being received. I know that I AM grateful for everything far beyond what I can even fathom. During these moments, within these prayers, I feel at Peace . I AM PRESENT. Thoughts and BEING are not separate, they are ONE. All is working together naturally within these moments of prayer.
SO! I will pray when I feel present. Trust that my presence is a living prayer. In my presence I will illuminate gratitude naturally. Rather than intending to pray at all the times I think are right.
Thank you! I love you!
Cassandra
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